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"I don't know."
"It's a fucking slaughterhouse."
" 'Processing,' that's what it means?"
"Shoot 'em and gut 'em. Yeah. Processing."
Wilcox pointed to an old machine. "What's that?"
Handy walked over and looked at it. He gri
"What'd they use that for here?"
"See," Handy explained, "this is why the world's got itself into deep shit. Back then, see, that was a turbine." He pointed to an old rusted spine covered with rotting fan blades. "That was how things worked. It went around and did things. That was the steam age and it was like the gas age too. Then we got into the electric age and you couldn't see what things did too well. Like you can see steam and fire but you can't see electricity doing anything. That's what got us into World War Two. Now we're in the electronic age. It's computers and everything and it's fucking impossible to see how things work. You can look at a computer chip and not see a thing even though it's totally doing what it oughta do. We've lost control."
"It's all pretty fucked up."
"What? Life or what I'm saying?"
"I don't know. It just sounds all fucked up. Life, I guess." They'd emerged into a large dim cavern. Must have been the warehouse. They tied or chocked shut the back doors.
"They can blow 'em open," Wilcox said. "A couple cutting charges'd do it.
"They could drop an A-bomb on us too. Either way them girls die. If that's what they want that's what they'll get."
"Elevator?"
"Nothing much we can do 'bout that," Handy said, looking at the big service elevator. "They wanta come rappelling in, we can get the first half-dozen of 'em. You know, their necks. Always aim for their necks."
Wilcox glanced at him then drawled, "So, whatcha thinking?"
I do get that look in my eyes, Handy thought. Pris says so all the time. Damn, he missed her. He wanted to smell her hair, listen to the sound of her bracelet as she shifted gears in her car, wanted to feel her underneath him as they fucked on the shag carpet of her apartment.
"Let's send one back to 'em," Handy said.
"One of the girls?"
"Yeah."
"Which one?"
"I don't know. That Susan maybe. She's all right. I like her."
Wilcox said, "I'd vote her most likely to hump. Not a bad idea to get her out of Bo
Handy said, "Naw, let's keep her. We oughta hang on to the weak ones."
"Second that."
"Okay, it'll be Susan." He laughed. "Not many girls around can look me in the eye and tell me I'm an asshole, I'll tell you that."
Melanie kept her arm tight around Kielle's shoulders, which were oddly muscular for an eight-year-old, and reached out a little further to rub the arm of one of the twins.
The girls were sandwiched in between her and Susan, and Melanie admitted reluctantly to herself that her gesture was only partially to reassure the younger ones; she also wanted the comfort for herself, the comfort of being close to her favorite student.
Melanie's hands were still shaking. She'd been u
She glanced at Susan and saw her looking angrily at Mrs. Harstrawn.
"What's the matter?" Melanie signed.
"My name. Giving it to him. Shouldn't have done that. Don't cooperate."
"We have to," the older teacher signed.
Melanie added, "Can't make them mad at us."
Susan laughed derisively. "What difference does it make if they're mad? Don't give in. They're assholes. They're worst type of Other."
"We can't -" Melanie began.
Bear stamped his foot. Melanie felt the vibrations and jumped. His fat lips were working fast and all she could make out was "Shut up." Melanie looked away. She couldn't stand the sight of his face, the way the black hairs at the edge of his beard curled outward, his fat pores.
His eyes kept returning to Mrs. Harstrawn. And Emily.
When he looked away Melanie slowly brought her hand up and switched from American Sign Language to Signed Exact English and fingerspelling. This was a clumsy way of communicating – she had to spell out words and put them into English word order. But it allowed the use of small hand motions and avoided the broad gestures necessary to communicate in ASL.
"Don't make them mad," she told Susan. "Take it easy."
"They're assholes." Susan refused to switch from ASL.
"Sure. But don't provoke!"
"They won't hurt us. We're no good to them dead."
Exasperated, Melanie said, "They can hurt us without killing us."
Susan just grimaced and looked away.
Well, what does she want us to do? Melanie thought angrily. Grab their guns away and shoot them? Yet at the same time she thought: Oh, why can't I be like her? Look at her eyes! How strong she is! She's eight years younger than me but I feel like the child when I'm around her.
Some of her envy could be attributed to the fact that Susan was the highest in the hierarchy of the world of the Deaf. She was prelingually deaf – born deaf. But more than that, she was Deaf of Deaf: both her parents had been deaf. Politically active in Deaf issues even at seventeen, accepted at Gallaudet in Washington, D.C., on a full scholarship, unyielding about the use of ASL versus SEE, militantly rejecting oralism – the practice of forcing the deaf to try to speak. Susan Phillips was the chic, up-to-the-minute Deaf young woman, beautiful and strong, and Melanie would rather have one Susan by her side at a time like this than a roomful of men.
She felt a small hand tug at her blouse.
"Don't worry," she signed to A
Kielle signed, "We need Jean Grey and Cyclops," referring to two of her favorite X-Men. "They'd tear them apart."
Sha
"Gambit too," Kielle signed. Pointing to Sha
Emily cried for a moment into the sleeve of her dress, printed with black and purple flowers. Then she bowed her head, praying. Melanie saw her two fists lift and open outward. It was the ASL word for "sacrifice."
"Don't worry," Melanie repeated to those girls who were looking at her. But no one paid attention. If they focused on anyone it was on Susan though the girl was signing nothing, merely gazing steadily at Bear, who stood near the entrance to the killing room. Susan was their rallying point. Her presence alone gave them confidence. Melanie found herself struggling to keep from crying.
And it'll be so dark in here tonight!
Melanie leaned forward and looked out the window. She saw the grass bending in the wind. The Kansas wind, relentless. Melanie remembered her father telling her about the sea captain Edward Smith, who came to Wichita in the 1800s and got the idea of mounting sails on Conestoga wagons – literally prairie schooners. She'd laughed at the idea and at her father's humorous telling of the tale, never knowing whether to believe it or not. Now, she was stung at the memory of the storytelling and wished desperately for anything, mythical or real, to sweep her away from the killing room.