The Potato Factory

This large head with its impatient, alienated nose was attached to a small, thin, short-legged body not more than five feet one inch in height. However, seated as he was with the cloth of his breeches pulled tight at the front, Ha

Sir Jasper was dressed in a dark cutaway coat above pale trousers and elegant boots, the heels of which were higher by a good two inches than might be normally supposed to be correct for the fashion of the day. A white silk choker finished off what Ha

'So, madam, you are the spouse of the notorious criminal, Ikey Solomons?'

'Solomon, sir, it don't 'ave an "s",' Ha

The officer sighed, 'Mrs Solomons, do not treat me like a simple-minded Bow Street ru

'And what unfortunate business is that?' Ha

'Forgery, madam! Defrauding the Bank of England by the printing of large denomination counterfeit notes of astonishing artistry to be passed through European banks and exchanged for foreign currency, and then reconverted to English currency again, though this time as the absolutely genuine article!'

'Me 'usband can do that?' Ha

'Ha! And how, pray tell, does he come to own the salubrious premises in Bell Alley?'

'Salubrious? 'Ardly that, sir, modest 'ouse to say the least. An uncle in Chatham, a slops dealer by trade, who passed away, Gawd rest 'is soul, a good man, sir, who left me 'usband a small legacy what we used to buy the 'ouse for rentin' purposes to decent folk. Our own little nest egg against 'ard times.'

'A modest house? Decent folk? A bawdy house in partnership with a well-known madam. A high-class establishment fitted out at great cost and with a printing press of the latest design in the basement, a nest all right, a nest of vipers!'

He pointed his unlit cigar at Ha

The nose on Sir Jasper's face looked at Ha

'Damn you, woman! Do you take me for a complete fool? I will have the truth, do you hear me!'

At first Ha

Ha

'Yes, sir, no, sir, but I du

'Mrs Solomons, I'm sure you are aware that a wife ca

Ha

'I du

'usband away! 'Im what's done no 'arm to no one! Where's the British justice in that?' Ha

'For God's sake woman, stop your damned caterwauling!' Sir Jasper demanded, banging his tiny fist once more down upon the table. 'I want your co-operation! I'm willing to pay a very handsome price for it!'

Perhaps it was the words 'pay' and 'very handsome price' that Ha

'Ow much?' she asked in a broken, tiny voice, throwing in a loud sob for good measure.

Sir Jasper immediately relaxed and digging into the pocket of his coat produced a box of matches and commenced at last to light his cigar. Then he leaned back so that his chair rested against the wall balanced on its rear legs, the front ones being raised from the floor. Blowing a most satisfactory cloud of cigar smoke to the ceiling, he addressed Ha

'Mrs Solomons, we have the luxury of a choice – we can either offer your husband's mistress an incentive to co-operate with our enquiries or you may, with some little encouragement, decide to… er… help.'

'Beg pardon, sir, me 'usband ain't got no mistress! 'E ain't the sort. All along I been thinkin' you must 'ave the wrong man, now I'm certain in me own mind.' She smiled ingenuously, her eyes bright from recent tears. 'Maybe the person what yer looking for is Solomons. Common as dirt, they is, everywhere! We is Solomon, no "s". Me darlin'

'usband is very particular on that point, you see it means summink entirely different, it's not so kosher with an "s". Cohen is priests, Levy also, but Solomon, that's yer actual royalty, that is! That's yer Royal 'Ighness, yer genuine King Solomon, ya know the geezer what met the Queen o' Sheba? 'E wasn't called King Solomons, was 'e now? Nobody ain't never 'eard o' the wisdom o' Solomons, 'as they?'