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She wrapped her fingers around the pen again. She pressed her free hand against her chest. She could feel the ring under her fingers. "Where is Valenti?" she asked.
Alex grabbed another dusty cardboard box and slammed it down on the top of the stack. He figured he'd sweep one half of the attic, then shove all the boxes over to the clean side and sweep the rest.
Are you ready to break down and get the ROTC thing rolling, bonehead? he asked himself. Because that's what it would take for his dad to stop coming up with work orders like this.
Alex grabbed the broom and started to sweep. He wondered what tomorrow's little job would be. He'd already cleaned the garage, the basement, and the attic. He'd done a ton of yard work, too. Maybe the Major would have him clean all the bathroom floors with a toothbrush. Alex knew there was no way he'd run out of ideas.
Being the last kid left at home sucks, Alex thought. Before his brothers had joined the military-making old dad very proud-they'd managed to do enough stupid stuff to get assigned their fair share of the grunt work.
Maybe I'll take a break and call Isabel, he thought. I should make sure she's okay. He yanked open the window and took a deep breath of the fresh air.
Oh, you're such a good friend, a little voice in his head mocked him. You want to talk to Isabel because you're so, so concerned about her. It has nothing to do with the fact that you start getting the shakes if you go too long without seeing her, just go into Isabel withdrawal.
There were footsteps on the stairs. Alex picked up the dustpan. It was probably his dad, coming to make sure he wasn't slacking off. He bent down and started to sweep his dust pile in the pan.
"Hi," a soft voice said behind him.
He glanced over his shoulder-and saw Isabel climbing into the attic with a bouquet of flowers in one hand. His heart gave its usual slam against his ribs.
"Keep doing what you were doing," Isabel said. "I'll just stand here and enjoy the view until you're done."
The view? Alex dropped the dustpan and straightened up fast. He was basically an equal opportunity kind of guy. But that didn't mean he was cool with Isabel giving him compliments on his butt.
"I can finish later," he mumbled. His face felt hot, and he prayed he wasn't blushing.
"The flowers are an apology present," Isabel explained. She thrust them into his hands. "I figured since it was my second apology in about a week, you deserved the deluxe version."
"Uh, thanks. If it's about calling me a charity case, don't worry about it. I know you were kidding." He set the flowers on the floor next to him.
"Actually, that's not what I'm apologizing for. Although I should apologize for that, too," Isabel said.
Oh no, Alex thought. She's going to say she's sorry about crying when I kissed her! This was awful. Couldn't they both just pretend that it never happened? Why did girls have to talk about stuff so much?
"What I wanted to say is that I've been totally using you to help me get through… what happened," Isabel told him. "I've taken up every second of your time just because I was afraid to be alone."
"That's not using me," Alex said. "We're friends."
"But the other thing… you know, me thinking about Nikolas when I was kissing you and crying and everything. I do owe you an apology for that," Isabel insisted.
It was bad enough that it happened. He really, really didn't want to do some postgame analysis of it all. "Forget about it," he muttered.
"I can't forget about it," she said. "I went to the mall after school. I wanted to look at the spot where Nikolas died, to prove to myself that I could take it." Isabel pulled in a long, shuddering breath. "It was horrible, but I did it."
"That took guts," Alex told her.
She shrugged. "Anyway, after that I went around to some of the other stores, places Nikolas and I had gone right before…"
Alex nodded. This had to be what hell was like. Listening to Isabel tell him all her special memories about Nikolas. He knew he told her he'd be there for her. And he wanted to be. But couldn't she do this part with Liz or Maria?
"I started thinking about him. And you. And I realized if Nikolas was still alive, and you were both standing right in front of me, I'd choose you," she said in a rush.
Yeah, she thought that now that Nikolas was dead. When they had really been standing right in front of her, she'd walked away from Alex and never looked back.
"Isabel, I… thanks for telling me that," Alex said. "But I don't think… I think…" Can you say babbling? he asked himself. "I don't think it's a good idea for us to try to be more than friends."
"Okay. I definitely understand," Isabel answered. "I just want to give you one more thing, then I'll take off." She pulled a little strip of photos out of her purse and handed it to him.
The photos were obviously taken in the same booth as the last set. Alex recognized the faded blue background. At least Nikolas won't be in these, he thought.
Isabel leaned forward and touched the top photo. "In this one I was thinking about how you helped get Valenti away from Max-right after you found out the truth about us," she said.
She pointed to the next photo. "And in this one I was thinking about the sound of your voice when you told me all those stories. I was sitting right on the other side of the door, listening to every word."
She slid her finger down to the next picture. "This is the one where I was thinking about the way you touched me at the homecoming dance. Remember?"
Alex suddenly found it hard to breathe. Yeah, he remembered. He definitely remembered.
"And the last one, in that one I was thinking about how much I want you to kiss me again," she said.
Maybe she really meant it, he thought. Maybe she really would choose me over Nikolas.
He leaned forward slowly, then he kissed her, his lips barely brushing hers.
Isabel kept her eyes open, looking at him the whole time. At him.
Maria felt like someone was stabbing an ice pick into the back of her eyeballs. She couldn't get her nose to stop bleeding. But she had to hold out a little longer. Valenti was in the warehouse with the ship. She had to see him when he left. If she did, she might be able to give Michael the exact location of the ship, the thing he wanted most.
"Where's Valenti?" she asked, gripping the pen in both hands. The dots spun around her, making her head feel like it was about to explode. When they clumped, she was back in the warehouse. Valenti hadn't moved since last time. A few seconds later the warehouse began to dissolve into the dots, and she didn't try to stop it from happening. She would check back in a few minutes. She needed to rest.
The dots clumped, forming her room. Maria took a deep breath and realized the blood had completely soaked the tissues in her nostrils. She reached for the box of tissues on her dresser-and the paralysis hit. She couldn't stop herself from tumbling onto the floor.
Don't panic. All you have to do is wait it out, she told herself, fighting to stay calm. You're not going to get hurt lying on the floor of your own room, okay?
Maria could feel the blood dripping out of her nose and sliding down the side of her face. The sensation was driving her nuts. She wanted to reach up and wipe the blood away. But she couldn't even move her little finger.
It won't be much longer, she thought. Her eyes started to feel dry and itchy because she couldn't blink them.
Not much longer, she repeated. Her skin felt itchy, too, itchy and hot. She must have given herself a carpet burn when she fell. Except… except all of her skin felt hot. Not just the part touching the carpet.