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“Morning, Dani,” Dr. Uriel said from her royal blue sofa. She handed me a file and a cup of tea. “This is my 9:30 client. She had an absent father and is struggling with feelings toward a new lov—” Her dark brown brows furrowed together. “Are you okay?” she asked suddenly as I took a seat across from her. “You’re quiet this morning. Anything you want to talk about?”
She crossed one leg over the other and leaned forward, the way she did when listening to all of her clients’ problems. I shifted in my seat. If I knew anything from the last five months of interning under Dr. Uriel, it was not to tell her anything that I didn’t want her to pester me about.
I made that mistake once when I told her that I still had nightmares about the piercing red eyes of Mom’s killer. She was hung up over it for weeks, telling me that I should talk to someone—meaning her—because suppressed feelings were nobody’s friend.
“I’m fi—”
“And don’t tell me you’re fine either. You know I see right through that,” she said.
If I closed my eyes and imagined hard enough, I could hear Mom in her voice. When she sat me on her knee at five years old and asked me what happened in pre-school one day, when she waited so patiently for me to tell her that the boy I liked was pushing another girl on the swings, when she gazed down at me with her pretty light blue eyes—so light that they looked like they were glowing—and said that it was okay not to be fine.
Instead of reminiscing, I gazed out the window and sighed.
From Dr. Uriel’s office, I had a whole view of the city. The morning sun gleaming off of the river next to us, hundreds of people brushing past each other on the sidewalks, red and blue buses picking up riders. I leaned against the back of the couch. “I just haven’t been getting much sleep. A few guys moved in next door and they were over all day Sunday.”
“Tell me about these new guys,” Dr. Uriel said, clasping her hands together. “Are they loud?”
I moved Mom’s pendant between my fingers, listening to it glide against the chain. Dr. Uriel eyed it. “No,” I said.
“Are they over a lot?”
“Yes.”
“What are their names?”
“Javier and Zane,” I said. She sipped her tea, waiting for me to continue. “And Eros.”
She paused for a long moment, gazing out of the glass windows. “Eros,” she said softly. “Is he the reason that you’re not sleeping?”
Damn. Was it that obvious?
When I didn’t say anything, she frowned. “Dani, I will tell you what I tell all of my clients. Whatever you’re feeling toward him—”
“I feel nothing toward him.”
She raised a sharp brow, and I pressed my lips together. “What you feel toward him is nothing compared to your relationship with Trevon, right?”
I closed my eyes when Eros’s black one flashed in my mind and nodded. “I know.”
Leaning toward me, she readjusted her black blazer and placed a hand on my knee. “Those feelings—those lustful feelings—are nothing compared to feelings of absolute love. They will pass, and so will he.”
I drew my finger across my knee. She was right. Lust was nothing compared to love. But love never made me feel like this before.
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CHAPTER 4
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Dani
Trevon wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close, as we walked into Crimson’s Nouveau, an upscale dining restaurant in the center of the city. Couples sat at the rustic bar in the center of the room, waiters placed plates of food in front of people in black leather booths, and the hostess who was standing in front of a chalky brick wall gave us a perplexed look when we just walked right by her.
“Aren’t we getting a table?” I asked Trevon.
He gazed down at me, leading me through a maze of people. “We’re meeting Maria and Eros here,” he said.
I stopped, pressed my lips together, and yanked on his sleeve. “What?”
“We’re meeting—”
“Why? Why them?” The only plan that I had come up with today after my little chat with Dr. U was to avoid Eros. No, not confront the problem head on like she would want me to do. Just ignore the problem and hope he’d go away.
Trevon shrugged. “I saw him this morning, and he asked if we wanted to go out. I didn’t think you’d mind, but we can leave if you want.”
“Dani! Trevon!” Maria yelled from a booth from across the bar. She waved her hands in the air, as if I could miss the bright orange cropped shirt she had on. Eros and his roommates were sitting in the booth.
Eros’s eyes were on me and only me. I gulped and squeezed Trevon’s hand.
Lust was nothing compared to my incredible, amazing, trustworthy, handsome boyfriend.
Trevon pulled me over to the table and immediately dropped my hand. He slid into the booth next to Javier, one of Eros’s roommates, and I grumbled to myself, taking the only open seat left which was directly across from the man himself—Eros.
My gaze stayed glued to the menu. Yet, I couldn’t help smelling that ci
Truth was, I was afraid that, if I looked up, Eros would be able to read every one of my thoughts about him last night. It was absurd, but I couldn’t risk it. Those thoughts were intimate and so damn embarrassing, especially with Trevon sitting—cluelessly—next to me.
After we ordered, Trevon curled an arm around my waist and leaned close. “Is everything alright? You’re tense.” His eyes were bright, and a small smile was plastered on his face.
Hoping that it would help me shake my lustful thoughts, I tried remembering all the times I’d seen that small smile on Trevon’s face. On the swings in elementary school when he shared his grape juice box with me. Through one of the foggy classroom windows while I sat in fifth grade detention alone because some girls were picking on him for his hair, and I wasn’t going to let them hurt my best friend. While we danced together in the rain in his backyard the night of prom because Kellan from his wrestling team never showed up as my date.
I had always loved Trevon, and one a
“Everything is fine,” I said, sipping my white wine. It was the only thing getting me through tonight.
“We can go if you want,” Trevon said to me.
Yes, please, let’s go home. Far away from Maria who kept gazing at me, then at Eros, then back at me like something had happened between us. Far away from Eros’s smoldering stare. Far away from these feelings that wouldn’t leave me alone, no matter how hard I tried.
“No,” I said. Trevon was happy, and this was one of his only nights he had off of work during the week. I didn’t want to ruin that for him, even if I had to endure the rest of di
Under the table, Eros’s foot grazed against mine. I pressed my lips together, trying to ignore it, but then it happened again. “Quit it,” I whisper-yelled across the table, not daring to look at Eros.
He continued.
“Stop.”
Still, his foot brushed against mine.
I raised my gaze and glared at him. He leaned back against the leather booth, swirling his glass of red wine in his hand. The black ring on his left index finger clanked against the glass. He narrowed those piercing green eyes at me as if he was trying to figure me out. And just when I was about to turn away, his eyes darkened.
They reminded me of my dream when his eyes were beautifully black with no whites in them at all, but…
My eyes widened. My dream.
Heat crawled up the sides of my neck, and I rubbed Mom’s pendant again. God, he had to remind me of that stupid dream.