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Her voice was gentler when she said, «How many times, Anita? How many times in the month you've been back together?»
«Seven,» I said, still not looking up. I hated admitting it, because the number alone said louder than any words just how much I enjoyed being in Richard's bed.
«Seven times in a month,» she said. «Wow, that's…»
I looked up, and the look was enough.
«Sorry, sorry, just…«She looked as if she wasn't sure whether she was going to laugh, or be sad about it. She controlled herself, and finally sounded sad when she said, «Oh, my God, Richard.»
I nodded again.
«Richard.» She whispered his name, and looked suitably horrified. It was worth a little horror.
Richard Zeeman and I had been off-again, on-again, for years. Mostly off. We'd been engaged briefly until I saw him eat someone. Richard was the leader — Ulfric — of the local werewolf pack. He was also a junior high science teacher, and an all-around Boy Scout. If Boy Scouts were six foot one, muscled, amazingly handsome, and had an amazing ability to be self-destructive. He hated being a monster, and he hated me for being more comfortable with the monsters than he was. He hated a lot of things, but we'd made up just enough to have fallen into bed in the last few weeks. But as my Grandma Blake told me, once was enough.
Of all the men in my life, the worst possible choice to be the father would be Richard, because he of all of them would try for the white picket fence and a normal life. Normal wasn't possible for me, or him, but I knew that and he didn't, not really, not yet. Even if I was pregnant, even if I kept being pregnant, I wasn't going to marry anyone. I wasn't going to change my living arrangements. My life worked the way it was, and Richard's idea of domestic bliss was not mine.
Ro
I kept giving her the look that makes bad guys run for cover, but Ro
Ro
«Sometimes twice a day,» I said.
She smiled. «Well, my, my…«Then waved her hand as if to keep from distracting herself. «But the odds are that it's Nathaniel's, right?»
I smiled at her. «You sound happy about that now.»
She shrugged. «Well, a choice of evils, ya know.»
«Thanks a lot, Ro
«You know what I meant,» she said.
«No, I don't think I do.» I think I was ready to be angry about her thinking the men in my life were a choice of evils, but I didn't get a chance to be angry, because two of the men in my life were coming through the front door.
I heard them unlocking the door before it opened, and their voices came raised and a little breathless from the run. They'd been able to run faster, and farther, without me along. I was, after all, still human, and they were not.
Standing between the island and the cabinets we couldn't see the door, but only heard them laughing as they came toward the doorway to the kitchen.
«How can you do that?» Ro
«What?» I asked, frowning.
«You were smiling.»
I looked at her.
«You smiled just at the sound of their voices, even with everything…»
I stopped her with a hand on her arm. One way I knew I didn't want them to find out about the maybe-baby was by overhearing a conversation. Their hearing was a little too keen to risk it. And here they came, my two live-in sweeties.
Micah was in front, looking back over his shoulder, still laughing, talking. He was my height, short, slender, and muscular in that swimmer sort of way. He had to have his suits tailored because he needed an extra-small athletic cut. You didn't get that off the rack. He'd come to me ta
We kissed and our arms just seemed to automatically glide around each other, to press our bodies as close together as we could with clothes on. He'd affected me this way almost from the moment we had seen each other. Lust at first sight. They say it doesn't last, but we were six months and counting.
I melted against his body and kissed him fiercely, deeply. Partly it was what I always wanted to do when I saw him. Partly I was scared, and touching and being touched made me feel better. Not long ago I'd have been more discreet in front of company, but my nerves just weren't good enough to pretend today.
He didn't get embarrassed, or tell me, «Not in front of Ro
«Was that for my benefit?» Ro
I turned around, still half in Micah's arms. I looked at her angry eyes and suddenly was ready to be angry back. «Not everything is about you, Ro
«Are you telling me you kiss him like that every time he comes home?» The anger was back, and she used it. «He's been gone, what, an hour? I've seen you greet him after a day's work, and it was never like that.»
«Like what?» I asked, voice sliding down. If she wanted to fight, we could fight.
«Like he was air and you couldn't breathe him in fast enough.»
Micah's voice was mild, placating, trying to talk us both down. «Did we interrupt something?»
I turned to face Ro
«Don't try and tell me you weren't rubbing my face in it, just now, with the show.»
«Go get some therapy, Ro
«I confided in you,» she said, voice strangled with some emotion I didn't understand, «and you put on a show like that in front of me. How could you?»
«Oh, that wasn't a show,» Nathaniel said from just inside the doorway, «but if it's a show you want, we can do that, too.» He glided into the kitchen on the balls of his feet, showing both the grace of his dance training and that otherworldly grace of the wereleopard. He pulled his tank top off in one smooth gesture and let it fall to the floor. I actually backed up a step before I caught myself. I hadn't realized until that moment that he was angry with Ro
He tore the tie from his ponytail and let his ankle-length auburn hair fall around his nearly naked body. The jogging short-shorts just didn't cover that much.
I had time to say, «Nathaniel — «and he was in front of me. That otherworldly energy that all lycanthropes could give off shivered off his skin and along my body. He was five-six, just tall enough for me to have to look up to meet his eyes. His anger had turned them from lavender to the deeper color of lilacs, if flowers could burn with anger and force of personality. Nathaniel was in those eyes and with that one look he dared me, challenged me, to turn him down.
I didn't want to turn him down. I wanted to wrap his body and that skin-crawling energy around me like a coat. Lately almost any stress seemed to feed into sex. Scared? Sex would make me feel better. Angry? Sex would calm me. Sad? Sex would make me happy. Was I addicted to sex? Maybe. But Nathaniel wasn't offering actual sex. He just wanted as much attention as I'd given Micah. Seemed fair to me.
I closed the distance between us with my hands, my mouth, my body. The energy of his beast spilled around us like being plunged into a warm bath that had a mild electric charge. He'd been one of the least of my leopards until a metaphysical accident had taken him from pomme de sang to my animal to call. I was the first human servant to a vampire to gain the vampire ability to call an animal. All leopards were mine to call, but Nathaniel was my special pet. We'd both gained from the magical bonding, but he'd gained more.
He lifted me up, using just his hands on my thighs. Even through my jeans he made sure I knew he was happy to be pressed against my body. So happy that it forced a small sound from me.
Ro
Nathaniel froze against me. Micah's voice came from behind us. «Baby?»