Garden of Sins

5. Analyses of Keaton John Rush, Caden

Alayna

It is evening and the warm light above the long white dining table illuminates the sumptuous food. Olivia seems to be a wonderful cook. I also regularly practice cooking in your kitchen. Your mother doesn’t use it anyway and she said I should let off steam. When I do, she is always happy. Once, I even made it clear to Mason after work that the food was made by his wife, not me. Unfortunately, he did not believe me.

The mood is relaxed but loud, chaotic, and amiable. I am not used to that. In our home, everybody eats when they want and most of the time it is microwaved food. Therefore, it is even more important for me to be able to cook to a certain extent. My mother simply has other things on her mind and my father... I am not going to think about him now, otherwise, my good mood will disappear.

I slide around on the chair and you smile every time you notice that I can’t find a position that doesn’t hurt me. You seemed to have built up quite a lot of pressure and earlier, you unloaded it extensively in the guest room. Caden. Twice. And this time, I pulled myself together and was quiet because you pressed your hand over my mouth so everyone would not hear what we were doing. And you whispered to me that I should pull myself together and fucked me even deeper. Caden. You can’t just do something like that in your grandparents’ house.

You sit next to me like you’re in the middle of nowhere and Carter sits on my other side. He appears to be stoned and smells like weed mixed with his cologne. He has some balls smoking weed here. I don’t think your grandpa will like that.

Carter’s dark hair falls across his forehead and he hardly manages to keep his eyes on his overflowing plate. His knee touches mine as if it is normal and irritated, I pull my leg back. Somehow, everything feels surreal, especially since the thing in the car earlier.

Across from me, Keaton Rush sits with his wife, appearing u

Hand in hand, Mason and Emilia are just now emerging from the basement and their eyes are bloodshot and glassy. Emilia giggles and her dark hair is a mess.

You and your brother make a disgusted face. “Not again. Not so obvious, Dad!” you murmur, tormented.

“Shut up,” he replies lazily and takes a seat on the other side of Keaton with Emilia beside him.

“Have you been smoking pot?” Carter asks, who looks just like them. Emilia snorts and can no longer breathe from laughing so hard.

“Oh, my God, I don’t believe it,” Ava cries in shock.

“Don’t you work for the FBI, DAD?” Carter asks. “Mom, fix your hair. I don’t like the way you look right now!” He seems so upset. Emilia continues laughing, which makes the corner of my mouth twitch. I love Emilia a bit. She is such a good mother even though she is not a Stepford wife.

“Yes, that’s where I work,” Mason replies unemotionally, supporting his cheek on his hand. “But sometimes, I get to do what I want. Especially in my basement.” With one finger, he points to the basement and Olivia briefly makes a face as if she remembers something specific.

“Fucking toad!” Keaton mumbles. Carter, you, Ava, and Mason all look at him questioningly because you don’t know who he meant. “What?” you ask first.

Keaton pauses. “I meant him, but you’re also fucking toads,” he mumbles and points at Mason with his thumb.

“BEAUTIFUL! Now that we’ve all sorted that out,” Olivia says, “we can eat!”

“I’m starving, Mom,” Mason mumbles sluggishly and Emilia starts laughing again.

I massage my temples because I am overwhelmed, but I also find it amusing. Especially that Mason and Emilia are still such a happy couple who also take the time to do crazy things together even though they are now parents. I love that and I wish my parents were that way. What I’m experiencing here is in stark contrast to the way I grew up so that it makes me a bit insecure, but with you by my side, I feel safe.

We start to eat and it tastes delicious. Olivia asks you and Carter about your studies.

Ava talks about her good grades and Emilia stares at her as if she knows she is lying, but she doesn’t betray her and instead, laughs every time Mason says something, even when it’s not fu

Carter is a

“And you?” Keaton asks me and I almost choke on my potato because he is speaking directly to me. Out of nowhere. My heart begins racing again. “Alayna, what are you doing?” He leans back, drinks his water, and stares at me. Everyone’s staring at me now. Oh, my God, I don’t like this at all. I don’t enjoy being the center of attention.

“I attend college?” I say sheepishly, which sounds more like a question. Now I’m getting stupid too. What must this man think of me? That I’m a moron?

“So, are you going to school or not?” he inquires softly.

“Yes, I go to school.” You stretch your arm over my backrest and as always, your presence immediately calms me a bit. I straighten my shoulders and try to shake off my insecurity. There is a new challenge every day, but I like to challenge myself. And with you at my side, I somehow always succeed. “I’m studying literature, but I’m considering switching to media design. Like Carter,” I explain, proud to have formulated a proper sentence. Besides, I think it flatters Keaton somehow when I subtly include his grandson.

“Literature? That’s nice,” Olivia says with delight. “I love books!”

“Me too!” Emilia exclaims and Mason pats her arm.

“It’s okay, baby.” Then she laughs again and Keaton rolls his eyes and looks at me again.

“How old are you?” he asks.

“Eighteen.”

“What are your parents’ names?”

“Um, what?” I reply, irritated.

“Your parents? What are their names, where do they live? What do they do for a living?” he helps me, unmoved.

Shit, I didn’t know I was going to be interrogated.

“My parents’ names are Grace and Harry Hastings. They live near the Rushes and own a small, over-extended drugstore. My father is a drunk and my mother spreads her legs for everyone. Sorry, Ava. Anything else, sir?” Wow, where did that come from? And so bitter too. Something must be bubbling inside me. I know he sees this as a challenge, but I can’t help it, I draw the line at my parents and if you push the right buttons, I get livid. And Keaton Rush does that. He pushes my buttons.

Meanwhile, Emilia isn’t laughing any longer.

I see Carter staring at me out of the corner of my eye. Your fingertips play with my hair. I love it when you do that and I relax again a little.

“Interesting,” Keaton says and bites into a potato. “Siblings?”

“I had a little brother,” I reply but keep the rest to myself. I don’t want to talk about Jamie’s death because it was the most formative event in my life and after that, everything fell apart.

Keaton does not push but continues with the questions. “Do you work?”

“I waitress at a disco on weekends, that’s where I met Caden, and during the week, if necessary, at a student cafe on campus, sir.”