Ugly girl

Daniella takes my hand and we sit down on her couch. I take a deep breath, just as I’ve learned to do any time I need to explain something from my past and I give her a look, letting her know that she needs to prepare herself.

I don’t keep her waiting any longer than necessary. “Thirteen years ago, after my parents were…murdered, Blake and I were taken by Anton Mathers and sold to the highest bidder.” Daniella closes her eyes and nods, there’s no surprise and it’s clear she had already thought the worst. All I’m doing by explaining this is confirming what she already knew.

“Oh, honey,” she says, squeezing my hand, realizing that the rest of this story isn’t going to be good.

I go on. “Lucien and Maria Valentine were the ones who bought us.”

Daniella sucks in a sharp breath, unintentionally squeezing my hand. “Maria?” she questions.

I nod. “You knew her?”

“Yes, Maria went to school with us. She hated your mom. She was so jealous of her. Of her curves, of her beauty, of the attention she received. Your mom was the apple of everyone’s eye and Maria wanted it for herself. She was awful to your mom.”

Pain rips through me. She was that jealous that she took her children. There’s no way she didn’t know who our parents were when we were stolen. I swallow back the lump in my throat and try to continue on without breaking. “They raised us in their home and by the time I was seven it had become clear that Maria wanted us only for the sake of boasting to her friends about the good deed she’d done in ‘adopting’ us, whereas Lucien was only interested in keeping Maria off his back.”

“I’m so sorry you had to go through that.”

“It wasn’t so bad until I was around thirteen and he started paying attention to the way I looked.”

Daniella’s face drops as she reads into my story and sees where this is heading. She shakes her head. “No, please don’t tell me he hurt you.”

“It started with just a bit of touching here and there. He had a business partner who he had promised me to so it came from the both of them, but it wasn’t until two months ago when he came into my bedroom.”

Daniella crushes herself against me, holding me tight with tears in her eyes. “I’m so sorry, Skylah. I’m so, so sorry.”

I nod, unable to get words out for a few long, drawn-out moments and when I speak, my voice is barely a whisper. “I know Lucien Valentine is Lucas Valery,” I tell her. “And I know he changed his name after he did the same awful thing to you.”

Daniella doesn’t pull back but I feel her sigh of resignation. “He did,” she confirms. “And it was terrifying.”

I nod into her shoulder. “It was.”

Her hand comes down on the back of my head as she holds me close. “Oh, sweet girl. I so wish I could take the pain away or tell you that one day it will get better, but it doesn’t. The memories will always be there but you have to learn to push through it otherwise it will cripple you.”

She pulls back as I think back to Slade sleeping peacefully in his room. “I think I’m starting to do that,” I tell her.

Understanding flashes in her eyes and a fond smile brightens her eyes. “Chelle and I always joked about you and Slade getting married and having a bunch of kids.”

“Woah, let’s just take it one day at a time. I still need to work out if I can stand his bad attitude enough to allow him in.”

“Don’t you worry about that,” she laughs. “That boy of mine is persistent.”

“I’m starting to learn that,” I laugh before letting out a deep breath and meeting her eyes. “Did you know that Lucien has been here? That he threatened Slade?”

Terror grips her and she clutches onto my hands. “What?”

“He wanted Slade to run me out of here so I’d go back home. He wasn’t going to do it but he threatened your family. Said he could get to you, your husband or your kids. I want to put him away. He deserves to be behind bars but I can’t do it alone. I don’t…I don’t even know where to start. It’s my word against his.”

She shakes her head in fear. “No. No, I can’t do this again.”

“Again?”

Her brows crease as a tear rolls down her eyes and she takes a heavy, shaky breath. “As you know, Lucas Valery raped me after high school. I was only eighteen and I thought he was a friend, so I trusted him. He took me to a party, slipped me some drugs and then raped me in the bushes. I still have a scar from when I cut my wrist on a branch. It was violent and terrifying and he said that if I was to tell anyone, he’d do it again, and again, and again. I’d met Slade’s father shortly after, we fell madly in love and got married and had our first child. It took me five years to build enough courage to go to the police.”

“What happened?” I whisper, sensing that so much more is yet to come.

“The night the report was filed, there was a knock on my door.” She pauses for a beat, gaining control of her emotions. “He came back. Lucien raped me in my home, right here in this very room and he reminded me of what he had said, that he would do it again and again. There was a lot of police attention on him and that’s when he disappeared. I found out years later that he had taken on the alias of Lucien Valentine and, I’m so sorry, I should have been strong enough to go to the police with what I knew, but I was so scared he’d come for me again. I could have saved you from all of that years ago. If I had known about you two…”

“Don’t,” I say, squeezing her hand. “You did what you had to do to protect yourself. You couldn’t have known that he had us.”

She lets out a breath and watches me for a second, but that second of pause is enough for me to start piecing together the puzzle. Did she just say that she’d already had her first son? She was eighteen when he first hurt her and five years later would have her at twenty-three. My mom had me at twenty-three and Slade and I are only six months apart…

“I hate that you had to go through all of that,” Daniella continues, not realizing the i

It couldn’t be possible…

I meet Daniella’s eyes and she realizes something is going on. “How…how old were you when you were pregnant with Slade?”

Her face falls as her eyes slowly widen with realization and just like that, I have my answer. She shakes her head, her eyes growing waterier by the second. “Please,” she whispers, “you can’t say anything. This would kill him.”

I stare at this woman in horror. It can’t be true. Slade is Lucien’s son. I find it impossible to speak, to even move. Daniella squeezes my hand. “Please, Skylah. I’ve never had him tested because I didn’t want it to be true, but I see it in him. I see it in his ma

My heart shatters for her but more so for Slade. She’s right, how will he feel finding out that he shares the same blood as the monster who repeatedly raped his mother and years later, the girl he likes?

My eyes drop to my lap and we sit in a deep silence as I consider the possibility of not sharing this with him. How could I not? But at the same time, this is so much deeper than me, so, so much. For me to tell, would mean betraying Daniella’s trust and sharing her shame with the one person she’s desperately tried to keep it from. I’m thrown back to that party, to where Blake shared with the world that I’d been raped and in that moment, I realize that I could never do the same to a fellow survivor. It has to be Daniella and it has to be when she’s ready.