From blood and ash

Chapter 35

 

 

On my knees, I stared up at Hawke, hearing his words and seeing what was happening, but it was like my brain couldn’t process any of it.

Or my brain was processing it and my heart…my heart was denying it.

We need her.

Alive.

We.

“You’re no fun,” Jericho muttered. “Have I told you that before?”

“A time or a dozen,” Hawke answered, and I flinched. My entire body recoiled. His jaw tightened, and he looked away, sca

Beside him, the wolven shook itself, a lot like a dog after coming in from the rain. And then it rose on its hind legs and shifted, fur curling inward to reveal skin that was thickening. Legs straightened, and fingers returned to their normal sizes. The jaw snapped back into place. Shirt lost somewhere, Kieran stood in torn breeches, the wound in his stomach from Phillips’ sword nothing more than a pink mark.

I sat back.

Kieran twisted his neck from left to right, cracking it. “This isn’t the only mess that needs to be cleaned up.”

A muscle flexed in Hawke’s jaw as he looked at me. “You and I need to talk.”

“Talk?” A laugh escaped me, and it sounded all wrong.

“I’m sure you have a lot of questions,” he replied, and I heard a shade of the teasing tone I was familiar with.

It caused me to flinch again. “Where…where are the other two guards?”

“Dead,” he answered without an ounce of hesitation as he rested the bow on his shoulder. “It was an unfortunate necessity.”

“I’m good at what I do.”

“And what is that?”

“Killing.”

I knew without a doubt that when he’d left the room, that was what he’d done. There was a buzzing in my ears as I became aware of others gathering behind him in the yard, their bodies still in the filtered morning sun.

He took a step toward me. “Let’s—”

“No.” I popped to my feet, surprisingly steady. “Tell me what’s going on here.”

Hawke stopped. When he spoke, his voice had softened just a fraction. “You know what’s going on here.”

The next breath I took scorched my throat and lungs because I realized that I did. Oh, gods, I did know what was going on here. The buzzing increased as I saw Elijah standing outside, arms folded across his barrel chest. I saw Magda, one hand protectively cradling her baby bump as she stared into the barn, her face pinched with…with sympathy and pity.

You deserve so much more than what awaits you.

That’s what he’d said to me last night. And me, stupid, naive me, thought he’d meant my Ascension. No. He’d meant this.

Magda turned, brushing past Elijah as she walked back to the keep.

“Phillips was right,” I said, my voice trembling as I said it, as I gave life to what I already knew.

“He was?” questioned Hawke, handing the strange bow to one of the men who’d appeared behind him.

“I do believe Phillips had begun to figure things out,” Kieran answered as he stared down at his stomach. The faint pink marks were already gone. “They were coming out of the room when I went up to check on her. She didn’t seem to believe whatever it was he’d told her, though.”

I hadn’t.

I hadn’t believed Phillips at all because I believed Hawke. I trusted him—trusted him with my life, and with…

There was a sudden pain in my chest that felt as if someone had shoved a dagger through me. I looked down because it felt too real, but there was no blade, no bloody wound that equaled the agony radiating through me. When I looked up, a muscle flexed in Hawke’s jaw.

“Well, he’s not going to be figuring anything out again.” Jericho gripped the bolt, tearing it free. Phillips slumped over. Jericho nudged the guard’s body with his boot. “That’s for sure.”

I turned back to Hawke, feeling as if the ground were splitting and shifting beneath me.

“You’re a Descenter.”

“A Descenter?” Elijah laughed deeply, causing me to jerk.

Kieran smiled.

“And here I said you were smart,” Jericho said.

I ignored them. “You’re working against the Ascended.”

Hawke nodded.

Another fissure formed in my chest. “You…you knew this…this thing that killed Rylan?”

“Thing?” chuffed Jericho. “I’m insulted.”

Hawke said nothing.

“That sounds like your problem, not mine.” I fully faced Hawke. “I thought the wolven were extinct.”

Hawke gave a casual shrug. “There are many things that you thought to be true that are not. However, while the wolven aren’t extinct, there aren’t many left.”

“Did you know he killed Rylan?” I shouted.

“I thought I could speed this up and grab you, but we know how that turned out,” Jericho chimed in.

My head snapped in Jericho’s direction. “Yes, I clearly remember how that turned out for you.”

His upper lip curled as a snarl of warning sent a wave of goosebumps through me.

“I knew he was going to create an opening,” Hawke answered, drawing my gaze back to him.

“For you…to become my personal Royal Guard?”

“I needed to get close to you.”

I sucked in a shuddering breath as my heart seemed to split open. “Well, you succeeded at that, didn’t you?”

That muscle in his jaw flexed again. “What you’re thinking…you could not be further from the truth.”

“You have no idea what I’m thinking,” I shot back, my hand tightening painfully around the dagger. “And all of this was…what? A trick? You were sent here to get close to me?”

Kieran’s brows lifted. “Sent—”

Hawke quieted him with a look, and Kieran rolled his eyes.

I knew what he was going to say. “You were sent by the Dark One.”

“I came to Masadonia with one goal in mind,” Hawke answered. “And that was you.”

I shuddered. “How? Why?”

“You’d be surprised how many of those close to you support Atlantia, who want to see the kingdom restored. Many who paved the way for me.”

“Commander Jansen?” I suspected.

“She is smart,” Hawke said. “Like I told you all.”

The backs of my eyes burned, along with my throat and chest. “Did you even work in the capital?” Then something hit me as my gaze darted to Kieran. “The night at the…” I couldn’t bring myself to say “the Red Pearl.”

“You knew who I was from the begi

“I was watching you as long as you were watching me,” he said softly. “Even longer.”

That blow nearly killed me. It was like my chest had shattered. I started to turn away, but I saw Jericho, who’d created a space for Hawke to gain more personal, intimate access to me.

It clicked into place with a tremor that almost caused me to drop my dagger. “You…you were pla

“For a very long time.”

“Ha

“I do believe his heart did give out on him,” Hawke answered. “The poison he drank in his ale that night at the Red Pearl surely had something to do with it.”

The buzzing was almost too much. “Did a certain woman there help him with his drink? The same one that sent me upstairs?”

Hawke didn’t answer. Delano, on the other hand, said, “I feel like I’m missing vital pieces here.”

“I’ll fill you in later,” Kieran commented.

I was shaking. I could feel it. Just like I could feel the walls of the barn closing in on me. I was so incredibly naive. “Vikter?”