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Bianca pounds on the door again. “The ambulance is on the way. Let me in.”
“Go downstairs,” Jace shouts.
“No. I want to see Liam.”
She can’t.
She’ll never see him again.
None of us will.
Because he’s never coming back.
“Bianca, go downstairs,” Jace screams again, but he’s choking up so bad he can hardly get the words out.
“Liam!!” Bianca cries, banging on the door harder. “Liam, come out here!!”
He can’t.
Guttural sobs wrench out of her. “I want to see Liam.”
He’s gone.
He’s never coming back.
“I need you to take her downstairs. When the EMTs get here, she’s go
I think Jace is talking to me, but he sounds so distant.
Everything seems far away. Like an alternate universe.
A universe Liam isn’t a part of anymore.
I feel different…less than.
Like something’s missing inside me. An organ or…
Bianca kicks the door. “Liam!”
“Cole.”
Liam and Cole…it’s always been Liam and Cole.
Now it’s just…
“Cole,” Jace pleads. “Please.”
“Okay.” I don’t recognize the sound of my voice. It’s shredded.
My vision is hazy, and my legs feel like limp noodles as I make my way to the door.
Somehow, I manage to turn the knob.
I’m so out of it, I’m not prepared for Bianca’s strength. She flies past me.
A high-pitched blood-curdling scream fills the room. “Liam!”
“Dammit,” Jace hisses.
“I’m sorry.” I turn to look at him. “I’m sorry I fucked up.”
I fucked up so bad. So bad he’ll never forgive me.
I’ll never forgive myself.
I scoop Bianca up, kicking and screaming, and barrel down the staircase.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper as she sobs.
I’m sorry your favorite big brother isn’t here anymore.
I’m sorry I didn’t listen to him last night when he needed me.
I’m sorry I hated him when I was supposed to love him.
I’m sorry he’s dead when he should be here.
The pain in my chest is back with a vengeance, but it’s not because Liam’s hurt.
It’s because—just like that green blanket—there’s a piece of me missing now too.
A piece I’ll never be able to fix or repair.
A piece I’ll never get back.
And it’s all my fault.