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Killian releases me. He looks to King and then to Delila. “Who fucked with her?”
Delila exhales, standing from the bed and moving to the center of the room. She turns to face me. “I swear you kids are aging me so much faster than I need to be aged.” She reaches for the pack of smokes on my bed and gestures to Killian for the lighter. He hands it to her and she takes a couple of small puffs on her smoke. “Your father didn’t do it.”
“I know he didn’t,” Killian answers smoothly. “I fucking asked him. Who do you think I’d ask first? He’s not bad enough to do that shit to her.”
Delila puffs again. “There was only ever you and the Four Fathers who could perform telekinesis, hypnosis and coercive persuasion to the extreme of it manipulating memories, Killian. No one else. And telekinesis only comes into play when we’re needing to move memories around inside someone’s head. It’s almost the same as moving real objects, only more, you know… realistic.”
“So I can’t unleash her memories like Keres did to Perse?”
Delila shakes her head. “No, and even if there was a possibility, we shouldn’t risk it.”
My hands shake as I snatch the smoke packet from Delila. I put a smoke in my mouth and Killian leans forward, lighting the end.
“There’s another possibility,” King exhales, standing from the bed. He moves to the front of me. “Maybe your father did do it, Killian, but he did it for her. Wouldn’t be the first fuckin’ time he tried to play hero.”
I freeze, blowing out a cloud of smoke. My eyes slam shut. “You guys are wrong. I remember everything when I was a kid. We lived in a two-story small house. I went to Kiznitch Elementary. I—we had a tree at the front of our home with a swing attached to it. I—”
“—the house was dark grey, and the bedrooms were the same color. Your bedroom was up the stairs and your parents at the bottom in a loft style.”
My eyes pop open and Killian is kneeling in front of me, his hands on my legs. “Babe, that was my house. My pool house that you lived in. What else do you remember?”
“Don’t push her, Kill…” King warns.
“I won’t!” Killian brushes him off. “Tell me what you remember.”
I suck in a breath. “I was young, so it’s natural to not remember every single thing, but I don’t remember living with your parents. That house was ours. I don’t—” I shake my head, reaching deep inside of my brain to find something. “I don’t remember the driveway.” My eyes fly to Killian. “Why don’t I remember the driveway?” My legs begin to shake again and my throat tenses. There’s ringing in my ears as I hold back a scream.
“She’s going to freak out, Killian, stop,” Perse snaps.
“Because they haven’t wiped your memories.” Killian stands back, squaring his shoulders. “They’ve only removed me from them. In her mind, I didn’t exist. My parents didn’t exist.”
Realization washes over me. He is right. I remember all of The Brothers growing up, not vividly, but I remember seeing them at school and everyone knew who they were. The whole town of Kiznitch knew who The Brothers of Kiznitch were. But Killian isn’t in those memories.
I stand to my feet, itchy to move. “Oh my god, I feel violated!”
“Tell me about it,” Perse mutters.
I swing around to face Killian. “How do I know you didn’t do this? Hmm?”
Killian snatches me by the arm and yanks me into his chest. His eyes are wild, his teeth bared. “Because the last time I saw you, Saskia…” His mouth slams shut. He seems to fight with himself on whether or not he should say anything. Anything at all. He releases me, bringing his cards closer to his chest.
“Because?” I repeat.
“I wouldn’t fuckin’ do that to you.” He shoots a look at Perse. “No offense.”
Delila takes a seat back on the chair in the room. “For some reason, I think I trust you,” she says to me, folding her leg over the other. “So, when I say these next words, you are to not allow them to leave this room. Understood?”
I nod. “Understood.”
Delila lights another smoke. “We go on the road tomorrow. No one knows this, but I have a bug planted in Patience.” She blows out a thick cloud of smoke.
“What?” King snaps. “Who?”
“About that,” Perse mutters. “You can take Callan.”
I snort, and then clear my throat.
Delila looks between Perse and I. “Oh what’s the matter? The two queens can’t take a bit of competition. Get used to it. Girls will always be all over The Brothers’ dicks.”
I rear my head back. “Yeah, I don’t care.”
Delila ignores me. “Don’t worry who it is. She has been in there a while and owes me a favor. I wasn’t waiting around and twiddling my thumbs, you should know this,” she says to King.
“I thought that we were going to wait…” King a
“For what? The Fathers to give their blessing? That will never happen because in their eyes, well, all but Kallisto, they’d just take them all out.”
“Seems legit.” Killian shrugs, taking a seat on the bed but facing me, with his knee pulled up and his elbow resting on top.
Delila laughs. “Sometimes I find it truly fascinating how similar you are to your grandfather. He would be proud.” Delila stubs out her smoke in the ashtray beside the bed. “We will go on the road tomorrow, and we will get to the bottom of this, Saskia.”
My eyes go to Killian. “Is that why you pushed me away? Because you thought I was using you? You thought I was here with you as some kind of revenge?”
He doesn’t flinch. “Yes.”
“I don’t have any memories of you,” I whisper, shaking my head.
“You won’t want them,” Killian answers.
I feel myself slowly crumbling inside, the walls I’ve spent so many years building slowly turning to rubble. My lip quivers.
Killian reaches for me, pulling me into his chest. I sink into his grasp, confused and not wanting to talk anymore. I don’t want to so much as entertain anyone with small talk.
“Is this official?” Perse asks, gesturing between us but pointing her question at Killian. “Because if it is, I have the right to chop off your dick if I see Callan hanging off your arm next time.”
I snuffle. Usually, I’d laugh, but with the mixture of everything that has been said, the sex and all of the orgasms Killian has given me tonight, I’m struggling to keep my eyes open.
“It’s not, but you don’t have to worry about Callan coming near me, Little Bird.”
“And other girls?” Perse persists.
“P,” King growls. “Let them sort that shit out, it’s none of your business.”
Perse sighs and then drops down opposite me. “We will talk some more tomorrow. For now, I need you all to get some rest.” Perse’s hand comes to mine. I relax at her touch. “I’m sorry, Saskia. I’m going to be here for you through everything.”
“It’s okay, Perse. It’s not your fault. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
She kisses me on the head and glares at Killian. “Take care of her, Trickster. I mean it about your dick.”
“Oh come on,” he jests. “The one time you say something about my dick and it’s in the context of chopping it off.”
“Snip, snip!” she sing-songs while closing the door behind her.
And then it’s just us.
“Hey.” He pulls me back, searching my eyes. I can barely look at him. I don’t know how to feel about or toward him now that I know—without knowing. When someone knows parts about you that you don’t know, they get to decide whether or not they want to give them back to you. That’s a lot of power for Killian to have over me.
“Just tired,” I murmur, yawning.