Gothicana

‘I’ll never leave.’

‘I’m glad she died.’

‘Tell my brother I didn’t kill myself.’

‘Give my family the news.’

‘Can you hear us?’

‘Jump, jump, jump.’

‘Why are you fucking alive?’

‘Don’t listen to them!’

‘Jump and end this, Corvina. You know you want to. There’s nothing for you here.’

Corvina screamed at the pressure in her skull, her eyes, her ears, her nose, her teeth, everything hurting as her body began to shake, unable to bear too much mental stimulation, her voice cracking as the pain in her head pounded through every inch of her body that just couldn’t move. Tears and sweat streamed down her face as she whimpered, swaying on the edge of the roof.

She felt herself begin to tip forward and closed her eyes.

An arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her back from the edge, her body stiff and hurting.

‘Why did he have to come?’

‘Tell my mom I didn’t want to go.’

‘Get away from the roof.’

‘Fucking die.’

“Look at me!” the deep command broke through the noise. She felt him turn her, his hands cupping her face and tilting her head, his voice cutting through all the ones in her head. “Corvina, give me those eyes. C’mon, baby.”

‘Leave him behind.’

‘Jump down.’

‘That’s the only end.’

Her eyes began to close.

“No, no, look at me. Stay with me,” his deep, gravel voice ordered, an edge of panic in it unlike she’d ever heard. She didn’t want him to panic. She was just going to sleep and shut off everything in her body – her skin which was sweating too much, her brain which just wouldn’t shut up, her heart which was pumping too fast, too loud, her body which seemed to be shaking out of her control.

Everything hurt.

“Corvina!” the terror in his tone reached her somewhere deep down where she was still capable of one last rational thought. Somehow, she fought everything inside her and opened her eyes for one split second to look at him, just to take him in one last time, her eyes locking with those beautiful silvers.

“The voices won’t stop,” she managed to whisper somehow. 

She became aware of him swinging her up in his arms as she began to murmur things she didn’t even understand, her eyes going blank, the voices in her head finally taking over.

This was what Danse Macabre felt like.