Аlone with yourself

I do not know whether someone stopped that day about a timid woman and a boy with a disability, I do not know whether they got to where they kept the path, I do not know what motivated them in such cold weather to decide on a risky trip, because the boy was really in the autumn jacket, I did not make a reservation. I only know that I did not help them, although I had the opportunity and would not bear any special time, financial or any other costs.

What I want to say with this appeal.

Help each other, friends, brothers, comrades, help. Not only that, please. After all, even if people who are predisposed to providing assistance are not always really doing it, what to say about those who are not able to serve a glass of water to his mother.

***

Don't want this Manifesto looked like a boasting of their own "goodness" compared to other, don't ask me to regret not asking to calm down and do not would cost You to hammer head my experiences. Just do not miss the opportunity to give a helping hand to those who are waiting for it, please…

Moment of weakness

How many same can be tossing and turning in bed, already, perhaps, at least, half an hour of exercise. Sheep thought, thought about something nice, about the summer, which is now so lacking in the midst of snowy January, green grass, meadows, small river, fishing quiet, and sleep still does not go. Now, imagine early sunrise illuminates the top of the powerful giants of rye…

… no, it's not what it is? Already one in the morning, and went I still wasn't eleven, it seems…

…aaaaaages… yeah, two hours are. No, well, it's on the one hand and not bad, it's better than I would stare into the TV box with some aggressive TV show, or, for example, prosazhival large bills in a nightclub with friends…

or friends. The echo of her friends to think better I would be there with them now well get drunk, and then fell to yanque, the Yankees have no harmful grandmother, then to Tamara, she makes me always happy to see night in polutropos condition and it is not an empty wallet…

…but again, by the afternoon of the next day, she will divorce me for the rest of the cash with these cautious requests characteristic of a modern girl with an endless mass of desires, waking up in the morning in the same bed with a non-distressed man…

… ndaaa, … what they after all, these girls … would spit on everything and would take for an hour someone from newcomers on the drunk road, Seryoga to me as the regular customer can even what discount issued…

…what a piece of shit I am. The girl just came to the city from the province, not God knows what winds brought her to the point, and I, a drunken Murlo, will also add to her life an hour of disappointment in this world…

…what misery, what crap, what a disappointment that I lay there thinking about all the creepy stuff instead of sleep, but how well it all began, the sunrise illuminates the top of the powerful giants of rye…

All right, two o'clock, sleep in either eye, take some air in the fresh air, breathe the cool night favorite wicked city…

Hastily dressed, threw on a warmer jacket, went down from the fourth floor on foot on a ladder as the Elevator for the night in the old ma

Well, it is, how clear the air, and the snow is blowing, like a fairy tale. No, as a child. In my childhood, God I'm last time so really happy this snowfall in childhood. I forgot that I love when sweeping large bunches of snow, because forward I begin to think about the inevitable traffic jams due to the cyclone and impassable courtyards, Parking lots. I forgot that I love the night because I have to hurry to work early in the morning. I forgot about such simple but irreplaceable pleasures of life, because I clogged my brain with all-round cares. How to get to work, how to execute a plan, how to pay loans, how to save money for another party and have fun from the heart. A really good I was never, nor one party, but each time was then really bad…

Wow, how sweeping, how to order moods, I now was that necessary, namely snowfall, and it is of such force that wanted to rip his cap, and lifting up his hands to shout to the world that I feel good…

…how cool, even smoke don't want to, although I, the first thing coming out of the house, always opened a fresh pack of "Java»…

… and there is no, quit Smoking all OK?? bear…

… right, I would even say – pull, but I said that I will not spoil this impression of smoke, so I won't…

… the guy said-the guy made!

… all the more that cigarettes remained homes on the bedside table…

"Hey, kid, good evening, can I bum a cigarette? No Smoking? That's right, that's good."

… well sweeps, as in childhood, the snow remained the same, remained the same impression, a sense of joy, a sense of celebration and carelessness, though it was much faster to pass, and I was different.

Okay, it's getting cold, like, and to work early, a moment of weakness has passed, went to bed.

***

Mobile phone call:

Sleeping? Senia, your you the domes, is already a pla

– Yes? How much now? Oh, looks like the battery on the alarm went out.

– Great, take her with you, she'll definitely end up in your anus, but it'll be the lesser of two evils, everything else in the bigger office, UP.

Well, that's how Monday morning usually starts, with a gentle but strong word from the boss in the phone. It is, of course, a little cry, puserdata, will have the whole day to walk inflated, to pretend not seeing me, and ever will throw me out with the job. But for now, I'm a sales REP for surrogate juices that don't want to move forward in the market, and I'll probably be sent several times today to… several times to… and maybe even hear from the saleswoman all the pain from the sales reps who visited her to me today.

Take a folder with the presentation of the product, make a wider smile and happy to enter the new pavilion proclaiming: "Hello"!

And in the evening, suddenly remembering the night a moment of weakness, involuntarily suffocating sadness. But really, my Dad was driving the old six, his mother worked at the school for peanuts, but just enough, valued life, rather than buy, my parents were not like me now, and maybe it was, I just didn't know about it.

There's a credit card "Audi" under the window, a rented apartment, junk food and tasteless tea. Could it have been any different? Was I dreaming about that? Is this how I wanted to arrange everything in my life? I guess that's what I wanted, but I didn't realize. And can be to risk? Take and change everything in one fell swoop, turn life one hundred eighty degrees? Sell Audi, pay off the loan, buy six, change jobs to a more stable, albeit less paid, well, maybe it's time to settle down, but to find a companion in life?

Yeah, I guess that is true, but first I will go to visit their parents. The last few years we just talked on the phone, I went here to work and burned a few years of life in vain. I'll find a place to work at home, after all, where I was born, and there came in handy. I'll get away from the hustle and bustle here, from this wrong life, if, of course, I can get away from myself. Tired, I'm tired to be a slave to the system, and there home all the same, but somehow less apparent, less visible and more sparing, has inflamed the consciousness of this system. Although, of course, for my mother's pies and father's help from this can not hide,…and so I would like…

***

And late at night, appearing on the threshold of his home, completely exhausted by the road and tormented by confusion, to hug my sister, who rushed to me, to look into my mother's eyes and shake hands with my father. And to know that I belong here.