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Для подготовки обложки издания использована художественная работа автора. Обложка книги разработана автором в дизайнерской программе и является интеллектуальной собственностью Николая Лакутина.

Attention! All copyrights to the play are protected by the laws of Russia, international legislation, and belong to the author. Its publication and reissue, reproduction, public performance, translation into foreign languages, changes in the text of the play when staged without the written permission of the author are prohibited. Staging of the play is possible only after the conclusion of a direct contract between the author and the theater.

Comedy for three or four people in two acts.

Duration 1 hour 30 minutes.

ACTOR

SERGEY is a man of about 40 years, the organizer of the original business;

YANA is a girl about 30 years old, a client;

ARTEM is a guy about 30 years old, a client;

LERA is a fairly stout woman of about 40 years, Artem's wife.

Jan and Leroux can be played by one person.

ACT ONE

1 Cafe

On the scene the girl. She puts her purse on the table, goes to another part of the stage, disappears behind the scenes.

After a few seconds, comes back, looks carefully in the direction it came from, observing someone. He sits down at the table. She takes a wad of money out of her purse, counts it, leaves it on the table. He looks around again, takes a book out of his purse, and settles down to read.

On scene rapid step goes Sergei.

SERGEY: Yana, good day. I'm sorry, I was a little late at the client's.

YANA (affably): Sergey, Hello. It's okay, I didn't wait too long. So you've caught the prey, not the teeth?

Sergey smiles smugly, hangs his jacket on the back of a chair, sits down opposite Yana.

SERGEY: Yes, right. There is not a man born who I have not been able to technically or not very technically, but still shut up. Down a peg with strutting peacocks is my calling.

YANA: Yes, Sergey, I confess, I did not expect that you will succeed. Here's the payment. (Gives the money) From our entire team thank you very much. The boss is a completely different person now.

Sergei smiles, takes the money, counts.

SERGEY: Wait a minute… looks like you made a mistake. There's more!

YANA: No, no, we collectively decided to additionally award your services. You have no idea how much you've helped us. We are now at work as a holiday. By God, like a holiday. Earlier, before stepping on the threshold of the native enterprise did not know what to swallow, whether validol, or Valerian. Not a day passed without attacks from the leadership. And in such a sophisticated form that… (waves his hand) I Don't even want to talk about it. Fortunately, that is now in the past.

SERGEY: Be calm, Yana. Now you and your colleagues will work in human conditions.

YANA: Thank you very much. How original of you to appear as a labour inspector. It took me a while to realize it was you. So naturally played.

SERGEY: well, so… Not the first day married, as they say.

Yana looks at her watch. Fusses.

YANA: I have to run. Arranged with the girls a small Sabantuy in honor of the " pacification of the moor." But still… Sergey, may I ask a question? Just curious…

Yana looks hopefully at Sergei, who is putting the money in his bag.

SERGEY: go Ahead.

YANA: How did you get involved with such a thing?.. shall we say non-standard activities?

SERGEY: Oh… I'll tell you.

Sergei makes himself comfortable.

SERGEI: Even in adolescence, I noticed a strange thing behind me. I loved humiliating people. Here is such a here is feature of, represent? Psychologists blamed it on mental disability, parents just did not know what to do. I was a terribly stubborn, free and unruly child. And once I had an interesting idea-to monetize this gift. After all, everything is not given in vain in this world. Do you agree?"

JANA: I Think so.

SERGEY: I met a lot of injustice on my way. The situations in which I lived from day to day I just turned inside out, Yes, I was impregnated with the spirit of treachery and ignorance, but at the same time the sense of justice in me did not sleep. Pretty quickly I realized that fists can not solve every question. Friends and comrades have repeatedly noted that I was relatively easily able to put people on the spot intellectually. And so that this fuse was enough for a long time… This observation formed the basis of my project.





YANA: Interesting-interesting… But the project… I will not be afraid of that word – impertinent! How did you decide?

SERGEY: Defiant, I do not argue, but so I do not mumble. Everything that seems at first glance absurd, almost always has a good basis for a successful start. The one who is not afraid to bring his idea to life-usually becomes successful. Read the history of most successful people. Who they were, what they did, and who they became. A bold idea and not a step back-these are the two whales on which any project is successfully implemented. And my business is no exception.

YANA: I just admire you. Well, all the girls are waiting. I ran.

Yana gets up, starts to leave the stage in a hurry, but suddenly turns around.

YANA: by the way!

Sergey attentively looks at the client.

YANA: do you give any guarantee? Well, in terms of the duration of this magic pendel. How long will the fuse of politeness last our boss?

Sergei laughs.

SERGEY: I do not promise that it will be silk all my life from now on, after all, you yourself dismissed it and allowed yourself to be treated like this.

Yana looks guiltily at the floor.

SERGEY: But let's do this. If within one month you will feel on yourself former pressure-address, I will repeat procedure free of charge.

JAN (enthusiastically clapping her hands): Thank you-thank you.

SERGEY: AND yet that this does not happen again, better not simply let more than the head of to play the king and courtiers servants. Enslaved conditions of exploitation of people have long been in history, so let them remain there. In any situation – stay with people and if we hit on the right cheek substitute the left, but! Don't let it hit you.

Sergei winks at Yana.

Yana runs up to Sergei, kisses him on the cheek and runs away, waving her hand.

Sergei sees off the girl look, after she leaves, turns to the audience.

SERGEY: That's how we live!

2 Apartment Of Sergei

Furnished simply but comfortably.

Sergei goes into the apartment, undresses.

SERGEY: UFF… I'm home at last.

He takes the money out of his bag, counts it again, and puts it back in the closet, putting some of the cash in his pocket.

SERGEY (to the viewer): the Amusing citizen got today. He clung to me like a tick. I thought, that no blows will not do. Vaughn was even late for his meeting with Yana. A

Sergei retreats to the kitchen area.

SERGEY (to the viewer): I Wound up today, so there is a hunt. We'll make something."

Sergei's mobile phone rings. He picks up the phone.

SERGEY: Hello?

He waits a moment.

SERGEY (laughs): no, that's right. What I do, in fact, is knock down the arrogance of those who greatly a

He waits a moment.

SERGEY: What is very a

He waits a moment.

SERGEY: AND what? Where? What area are you in?

He waits a moment.

SERGEY: So do I, too. Look, if you're close, maybe… run in? Barnaul 2 apartment 17. Can you? Well, fine, let's discuss everything here.